By The Landlord
“University brings out all abilities, including incapability.” – Anton Chekhov
“I was not a good student. I did not spend much time at college; I was too busy enjoying myself.” – Stephen Hawking
“If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.” – Derek Bok
“Dublin University contains the cream of Ireland: Rich and thick.” – Samuel Beckett
So when you’ve left school, what did come next?
Life became harder? Simpler? More complex?
The future’s uncertain, career coming later,
So the route some might take is the old alma mater.
University, art school, poly or college,
The gateway to much, and if lucky, some knowledge.
So open the books, and get library access
It’s time to delay life, as well as progress,
Find who you are, explore and express
And learn more and more, about less and less.
Ah! Student days, the best or the worst?
Parties and dropouts, or starred double first?
A rung up the ladder, the heart of the nation,
Lauded, applauded in gowned graduation?
A time to look back on, reflect on that bubble?
Best time in life, or depression and trouble?
Friends made for life, with everything set?
Or pressure and strife, and then endless debt?
All ups and the downs, to learn, life prolong,
This week all to find, expressed in a song.
Ah! Stupid students! Idiots and wasters?
A stain on the system, those copiers and pasters!
Drinking their grants without any thanks,
A strain and a drain on their mum-and-dad banks.
Idling their time in those cheap Union Bars,
Stoners and moaners, all hair and guitars,
Dicking about and just led by their hormones,
Staggering home with heads inside traffic cones,
So many resources to move up life’s rung,
Isn’t education just wasted on the young?
Ah! Universities! Prime ministers and presidents,
Built up their networks in those halls of residence,
From Oxford or Cambridge or Harvard to meet
All the right people, in a powerful elite.
But for some it’s just learning, to get a skill,
Technical college, more focused, to fulfil
A particular role, and then get their jobs,
Not stuck with the crap about class, cliques and snobs.
But college is also about where you fit,
Changing and getting to know your own orbit.
Many musicians first met at a college,
Furthering first, some other knowledge,
Rhode Island School of Design did by chance
Make one David Byrne talk heads with Chris Frantz,
New York’s Bard College was where things began
For Becker and Fagen to make Steely Dan.
Hank Shocklee and Chuck D of Public Enemy
Met at University - Long Island’s Adelphi.
Imperial in London, success or a failure?
Two restless dropouts: Brian May, Roger Taylor.
Three Pink Floyd members all honed their technique
Not doing music at Regent Street Polytechnic.
Tuskegee Institute swung open some doors
Bringing together all six Commodores.
Leeds University gave Alt-J their number,
Vampire Weekend all met at Columbia.
A class of experience and all the partyings
Found Jarvis of Pulp on a course at St Martin’s.
But Dylan and Joni rode off on their horses
Dropping right out of their own college courses.
Oh student days! From young to mature,
How did it compare with the glossy brochure?
Freshmen, fraternities, wild parties, best buddies?
Heady or hard times? Remote lonely study?
Extraordinary people? Did tutors discuss
Obscurities , oddballs , all on the campus?
Did learning bring riches, a sense of finesse?
Or education beyond all usefulness?
So on all college rights, and also its wrongs,
Turn over your papers and gather your songs.
Robert Zimmerman - Minnesota University dropout
Frank Zappa: from mortar board onwards
Joni Mitchell from Saskatoon Technical Collegiate and Alberta College of Art in Calgary
Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top and Warner Brothers' art school in Hollywood, California
So then, please suggest your songs relating to anything on higher education on comments below. And I’m delighted to welcome back to this seat of learning our very own prolific professor of compilation and Master of the Marconium, Marco den Ouden! Deadline for songs is Monday 11pm UK time, for playlists published next week. May you all pass with flying colours …
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