By Nicko
Well, I hope I get a plaque for guruing this week, it would be the crowning glory. But if you don’t like the lists, bite me!
Teeth and dental hygiene are important. So is music. Combined, there seem to be fewer songs than I thought there might be.
Let’s get chewing.
Amalgam A-List Playlist:
Slim Cessna's Auto Club – An Introduction To The Power Of Braces – Teeth (happyclapper)
The Club are getting braces to make them straight. Including on the teeth. Not really about orthodonture – don’t believe them when they say they want to be straight.
Dinah Washington – Long John Blues (Fred Erikson)
Dentist fills cavity. You get the drill. Unknown personnel, but toothsome guitar. Dinah also did one asking where her daddy with his big, long, sliding thing is. A trombone, of course. What did you think? Not the only dentist fills cavity song – see the G-list!
Lorde – White Teeth Teens (Uncleben)
A song about the perfect teens, cliques, being in or out? Many interpretations on the web, nothing definitive. Zadie Smith reference? The Lorde Wiki notes she has numerous songs about teeth. She is quoted as saying it’s a weird obsession, but she doesn’t like dentists.
The Mighty Diamonds – Gnashing Of Teeth (Dean Nardi)
Weeping and wailing and moaning and gnashing of teeth
Weeping and wailing and moaning and gnashing of teeth
Do you hear?
Teeth being the only thing you can gnash. It’s in the Bible, hence the Rasta interest. When judgement comes there’s going to be plenty of it. Not even sucklings will be spared despite not yet having teeth to gnash.
Tindersticks – Milky Teeth (barbyn)
Yeah, these teeth, they look so milky
You would trust them with your neck.
Necks being a soft and inviting target for teeth. Tanya below aimed for ripping if needed. Add bloodsucking or nibbling.
xiangyu – 入れ歯 [Dentures] (ajostu)
A song about lost dentures, surprisingly the only one this week. Here’s producer Gimgigan: … lyrics that express the emotions of three people: the person who found the fallen dentures, the person who found the dentures falling and the person who dropped the dentures. The track is a catchy mix of drum 'n' bass and surf rock.
Glad that’s cleared that up.
Tools You Can Trust – Show Your Teeth (MussoliniHeadkick)
Bit of 80s bang and crash with a political edge. About standing up and fighting? Someone might know what Clause Four is/was. Showing the teeth of course a threat or defensive posture.
Genesis Owusu – Smiling With No Teeth (severin)
Title track to his 2021 debut album. Ghanaian-born Australian. Disparate and diverse. Underlying themes of racism and mental health (a black dog is featured with two meanings here). Band assembled with no prior rehearsal, hot uncomfortable room, 10 hours of largely jams cut down.
This is a slow little ditty, much of it spoken. Bits about people wanting it all. And ‘smiling with no teeth’ means “pretending things are okay when they’re not” as he has said. Bit over the top on the gold teeth in the pic though, Genesis.
Eaglebear Singers – John Wayne’s Teeth (BanazirGalbasi)
Have you ever seen them? Don’t trust a man whose teeth you can’t see, especially if you are Native American and the man is white. From the soundtrack of a movie called Smoke Signals. Mind you, it’s said the old laconic outback Aussie talked out the side of the mouth so as not to let the flies in. Maybe the same for the Duke.
Tanya Tagaq – Teeth Agape (tincanman2010)
Touch my children
And my teeth welcome your windpipe.
Tanya is fashioning herself a wolf to protect her children. Sharpening claws, baring the teeth and threats of attack. A Inuk woman from Canada, tincan points out there is a meaning here about the taking of indigenous children from their parents. Echoing what we call the Stolen Generations in Australia.
Lady Gaga – Teeth (severin)
I’ll leave it to LGG to explain: “It is meant to mean two things, the first one kind of juvenile sexual provocative connotation is about oral sex, but also the monster in the song is fear of the truth. 'Show me your teeth' means 'tell me the truth' and I think that for a long time in my life that I replaced sex with the truth.”
Producer Teddy Riley produces the funk.
Working Men’s Club – Teeth (vanwolf2)
I see grit in your teeth as you stumble to watch me
In stare of subconscious despair.
Nothing seems to go his way. He sees grit in his/her teeth, but why? Lots of obscuro lyrics this week. Lots of edgy sounds too of which this wasn’t the edgiest.
Free – Sweet Tooth (ShivSidecar)
I give her all my sugar
She’s got a such a sweet tooth.
Your sweet tooth song of the week. And your 1969 bluesy psych song of the week too. Guitarist Paul Kossoff didn’t even get to the 27 club, dying at 25.
Roky Erickson & The Aliens – Night Of The Vampire (TarquinSpodd)
Poor Roky might have seen vampires in his confusion…certainly he seems a bit confused here because any self-respecting vampire is not going to leave pools of blood Some good vampire songs nommed, this one won the toss.
John Williams – Theme From Jaws (Marconius7)
Because I can’t resist, plus it’s a chance to tell my Jaws story to finish.
I walked the 96 km Kokoda Track over the Owen Stanley Range in PNG with friends when I was 21. The rugged foot path of the locals, then the Japanese aiming for Port Moresby from the north. But they were halted for the first time anywhere in WWII by Australian troops and militia with help from the locals. And eventually retreated, never getting to Moresby.
After, we took the local transport down to the coast, where there is a great fringing reef where a local had been nipped by a reef shark a bit before. And there was a film night showing Jaws 2. I recall the suspense building with the music as an attack was coming and the locals cheering when the attack happens. Fun it was too.
Bicuspid B-List Playlist:
Spike Jones & His City Slickers – All I Want For Christmas (Is My Two Front Teeth) (Marconius7)
A cheesy fun song written in 30 minutes that became a big hit. This is the first version with Spiky sound effects. Later versions play it straighter.
Weird Al Yankovic – Cavity Search (Marconius7)
This is it, pal, root canal.
Why say Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me when you can say Numb Me, Drill Me, Floss Me, Bill Me? My choice of novelty song this week, but for fun see the Steve Martin musical turn from the remake of Little Shop Of Horrors as nommed by SHA along with the original flick too – not only for Jack Nicholson as a masochistic dental patient.
Screaming Lord Such – Dracula’s Daughter (ShivSidecar)
Mad choice for a girlfriend, Such. Watch it if she asks if she can kiss your neck.
Timothy – Bulldog Don’t Bite Me (magicman)
A bulldog without teeth isn’t scary, so we can assume teeth here. His landlady’s dog is scaring Timothy. Dog even gets to eat at the table. I’m wondering if this is some reference to the British Bulldog, given Timothy was one who moved from the Caribbean to the UK in the 50s. Lots of calypso comment songs on that.
Devon Irons with The Upsetters – Ketch Vampire (TarquinSpodd)
Quite a few vampire songs in reggae. About catching them, pushing them back or the like. Not literal ones, but bloodsuckers of Babylon mashing up the scene. Obidiah was a prophet. My biblical knowledge is sketchy, but I suspect the reason he is invoked here is the rhyme.
Scientist - Your Teeth In My Neck (Uncleben)
Scientist has a whole album about ridding the world of the undead (Scientist Rids The World Of The Curse Of The Vampires). Dub, love and unity should do it, rather than garlic and silver spikes to drive through the vampire’s heart. Really tried for this one or Ketch Vampire for the A.
The Hollies – Crocodile Woman (She Bites) (severin)
Like sharks, crocs get a bad press. For their smile and their teeth.
WITCH – Tooth Factory (TarquinSpodd)
The best known Zamrock band, blasting away in 70s Zambia. Pretty rough and I am unclear what the tooth factory refers too. Suggestions on a postcard, thanks.
WITCH aka Witch meant We Intend to Cause Havoc! And they did back then with riotous shows, until economic decline, the advent of disco, then the death of many members from AIDS. Reformed after a long time by one original member, dubbed Jagari after Mick.
Sparklehorse with PJ Harvey – Eyepennies (Noodsy)
And that old tooth I believe was a bear’s.
Quiet song about death, PJ effective when she comes in. Only one reference to a tooth, but a good one.
Wilco – Summer Teeth (ParaMhor)
No teeth were mentioned, let alone harmed, in the making of this song, AFAICT. Still, summer’s coming here…
Stew & The Negro Problem – Cavity (untergunther)
Sister there's a cavity in me
Your sugar causes me such endless pain
I was blind 'till I ate your sweet thing.
A sugar/cavity song. That makes it dental enough.
Lotte Lenya – Die Moritat von Mackie Messer (@tincanman2010)
Famous tune and famous words, especially as Mack The Knife in English, done so often without regard for Brecht/Weill’s biting intent in 1928. The shark shows his teeth, pearly white. But it’s zedded by lyricist Bertolt Brecht in German, so it’s just a B.
Gargling Guru’s Toothpick List:
Jackie Orszaczky & The Grandmasters – Smile Machine
A comment on advertising and the importance of your ‘smile machine’. The late Jackie was a bass player and singer who never got the recognition he deserved. He was Hungarian and a bit of a minor star there before moving to Australia. Chris Abrahams, best known for The Necks, is on keyboards.
Fades out with a bit of a whimper, but it’s a nice groove.
Lonnie Johnson and Victoria Spivey – Toothache Blues Pt 1
This one and the next are two more from my collection of dentists filling cavities songs. Vickie’s ache is killing and she needs a drilling. Lonnie can assist. Part 2 continues the treatment.
Duke – Dentist
Dentist fills cavity calypso style. His very first patient hasn’t been drilled before.
Sugar Minott - Don’t Bite The Hand That Feed You
Teeth are implied in this saying – it’s not ‘don’t gum the hands that feed’. Sugar is bad for teeth, but he is pretty sweet here.
Weed Out Vampires – Cornel Campbell
One of my favourite reggae vampire songs. I couldn’t A-ccommodate the good ones nommed (Tosh, Irons, Scientist) so I indulge here. Not well known from 2013.
Busy Signal – Bou Yah "Vampire Teeth"
A that really gwaan, me Don?
Vampire teeth dem use fi bite the hand?
Sell out dem soul, and no 'member the place dem come from and where it all began.
And another, terrible indulgence. But this is modern dancehall so different style. Vampire bite de hand. Amongst lots of other stuff. Busy’s patwa is as dense as tooth enamel. If in doubt, say ‘dawg’ at the end of the line and shout ‘bou yah’ in the right places.
Madder Lake – 12lb Toothbrush
Some Aussie hair and denim proggery from 1973. What does the 12lb toothbrush have to do with anything? Nothing, apparently. Or if you listen to the song, na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-nothing.
Skin Of Our Teeth – Hunters & Collectors
And we'll be hanging by the skin of our teeth again
Spinning by the skin of our teeth again
And dangling by the skin of our teeth again
The Hunters from their debut in 1982, not many lyrics in a long song, but your skin of the teeth song for the week.
Straight from the horse’s mouth
These playlists were inspired by readers' song nominations in response to last week's topic: Fangs for the memories: songs about teeth. The next topic will launch on Thursday at around 1pm UK time.
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